12.06.2005

old about me

It kind of fluttered once it hit the grass, its crooked wings jack-knifing awkwardly as they slapped and tangled with one another. It tilted its flat grey head and peered up at me through the reeds, unblinking. One could only feel pity for its golden-eyed sorrow.
I stalked slowly toward it, reeling my string in with even deliberation as I did. The kite was utterly destroyed, savaged by the serendipity of long curved talons and four flailing wings. It began keening piteously as I approached, limping little hops strained against the tightening wire. I could better appreciate its delicate colouration from this proximity. The head might have been grey, but the rest of its body was glossy with an iridescent dark blue. White eyelids were dabbed beneath black streaks that continued down its neck to its coverted shoulders. It opened a silver beak on a black tongue, hissing.
I reached out a hand.

2.23.2005

freewrite

A tiny, wriggling imperfection in the corner of the eye. Turned for better perception, it slides until you find yourself staring at a blank wall with a spot in the peripheral you cannot see. It is the thought of a reality different than your own. The idea that the world, as you understand it, does not compare to the roiling vastness of truth steeping beneath its surface.
That is how I perceive it now. The entirety of the visible world, the surface of some vast body of water. Every now and again even the average person receives a hint of this. A rippling that might be the jerking spasms of a tired eye. A glimpse of movement that might be paranoia or stress. Nothing to indicate anything other than the stable perimetres delineated by reflecting light, reverberating soundwaves, physical resistance of surfaces or airborne particles.
Even I can claim only tentative knowledge of this realm. My sight is clouded by those ubiquitous landscapes and beings which it is within the ordinary ability to comprehend. I understand your own involvement to be greater, however, and so it is with urgency that I pen this note.

2.13.2005

refusing to be alone

It folds and slides about my shoulder
Leaving my wonder to follow it there
I avoid diverting my gaze to enfold it
Knowing that knowledge dissolves the mystery
And the mystery is all that keeps it alive

I will refuse to murder you
My little invisible accomplice
Please stay with me
Though I will never know that you are there